Tis the season for children throughout the world to put crayon to paper and scribble a heartfelt list of wants and needs with the hopes that it will be enthusiastically received by old Saint Nick to be unrealistically fulfilled from A to Z. Go ahead, add up the cost to Santa on the next list they give you to send… it’s enough to put them through their first year of college. And it gets worse the older they get. Perhaps you can toss a few items off their lists with the old adage and fun-to-quote classic line from A Christmas Story… “You’ll shoot your eye out!”
Here’s the list of “10 Worst Toys of 2020” according to World Against Toys Causing Harm, Inc.
1. Calico Critters Nursery Friends – Potential choking hazards
If these are friends I’d hate to meet their enemies.
2. Missile Launcher – Potential for eye and facial injuries
No brand, no catchy name, it sells itself… Missile… Launcher. Just like the excitement you feel when you hear… Bottle… Rocket.
3. Marvel Avengers Vibranium Power FX Claw – Potential for eye and facial injuries
New to Disney+, A Black Panther Christmas: The Northern Scar
4. Gloria Owl – Potential ingestion
What does owl taste like? Chicken…
5. WWE Jumbo Superstar Fists – Potential for blunt force and impact injuries.
Well… they weren’t made for taking cookies out of the oven…
6. Sci-Fi Slime – Potential for chemical-related injuries
Hey kids! Have you ever wanted your skin to glow? You’re a human nightlight!
7. Boomerang Interactive Stunt UFO – Potential for propellor-related injury
Every word in that name…
8. Boom City Racers – Potential for eye and facial injuries
What could possibly go wrong in BOOM City???
9. My Sweet Love Lots of Love Babies Minis – Potential choking hazards
My sweet lord! Get the tweezers… Sally has a Love Baby stuck in her nose… again.
10. Star Wars Mandalorian Darksaber – Potential for blunt force and eye injuries
May the blunt force be with you
Stay safe, stay healthy and stay away for toys that injure children this holiday season. Happy shopping!
PS - I grew up with this...
An electric toy that features questionable chemicals and heat-activated molding. AND... the creepy crawlers looked tasty as hell.
Oh! And these...